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There is place, glimpsed only on social media, called “Fitness Land”. It is a gleaming, spotless kingdom, populated by rippling abs, avocados and neon leggings, where people communicate solely in motivational hashtags, always stay humble and are constantly grinding. In this magical province, leg day is never skipped, PRs are constantly smashed and all meals are […]
We live in an age of instant gratification. Whether your tastes are mainstream (the latest films and music) or more off-piste (vintage headstones, excremental sculptures, men playing banjos with their ballbags), so long as you’re connected to the internet you can find what you want in a matter of seconds. As a society, we are now so […]
Early in my career I was playing a club game in Christchurch for Marist Albion. A teammate had taken it into contact and I was the supporting player so had to clean the ruck ahead of me. I had come from the fly-half position and had a good start of five metres to clean out […]
When God created the squat, he didn’t just say, “Lo, ye angels, I have created yet another exercise, now let us knock off early for the day”. No, he gathered all the gang around him, Jesus, Satan, Gabriel, and proclaimed, “Behold the squat, a divine movement by which men shall attain massive muscles and women huge luscious bottoms”, […]
Whether we like it or not the festive period is being forced upon us once again. And like every Christmas, most of us are going to be eating and drinking a whole lot more whether we plan to or not. Although obvious health advice would be to simply not stuff your fat fucking face, this […]